EVENT OF THE YEAR: premiere of the IKEA 2020 catalog. This time you won t find it in the mailbox

Nothing Amsterdam, Paris or other London, nothing Huaweie, Samsung or iPhone. This event took place at the Warsaw Targówek. Premiere of the Ikea 2020 Catalog.

I got up early to get ready. I couldn't sleep any longer with excitement. Festive clothing was ready in advance. Pulling my stomach, I put on the best jeans (maybe I bought 2 kg ago, but without holes) and the least crumpled blouse from the whole wardrobe. This Day has come. Ikea showed its new catalog and I ... I was invited to the premiere, which, as promised by the invitation, was to reveal to me "a world of inspiring ideas and clever solutions, musical elation and culinary sensations!" . This is not some premiere of another phone, laptop or game. This is the premiere of the Ikea 2020 catalog. An inconspicuous booklet, whose power is dangerous to underestimate.

The Ikea catalog is not just a shop newsletter, because Ikea is not just a store

When a young couple decides to live together, they must undergo numerous trials to show that they are ready to form a herd. The first of these is the Mother-in-Law Test, the second is the Test of Lowering the Toilet Seat, and the third and most dangerous is the Ikea Test.

I remember when, with the Love of My Life, we went through this sanctified meatballs in cranberry sauce ritual. It was a day full of terror and tension, when, aware of the importance of the event, we crossed the threshold of this store for the first time. With trembling heart, we sneaked down the corridors towards desirable desks, without looking sideways.

Don't turn around - whispered MMŻ-et at one moment, and I felt the fear in his voice - behind us are the pillowcases that you'll like. I closed my eyes. I knew we didn't need a new pillow case and ... that if I looked back. A silky demon of floral designs will try to seduce me into temptation. So I reached out confidently to MMŻ-eta, and he led me through the winding corridors of fluffy pillows, bright candles and cream quilts to the exit and to the safe pastures of the restaurant. After a while, we wandered on to catch our breath. Unions collapsed around us, crashing into the marble edges of the bathtubs, and the service ran to the rescue of couples banging their heads against the wall when choosing the color of the walls (the incapacitated wife claimed that her husband's head only checked if the paint does not go away too easily).

The union that survives this test victoriously renews Ikea's Vows in the Catalog Ritual once a year. When the Ikea Catalog will appear in the household for the next year, couples decide to go through the cleansing shop fire once more and harden the relationship more strongly. Less bravado individuals undergo the test only symbolically, limiting themselves to ordering online the garden chairs selected jointly from the catalog. The outsiders release one representative of the herd for Swedish hunting. This is an expression of the highest trust for the hunter (or the partner's fear of him).

The premiere of the Swedish Grail

It is no wonder then that the premiere was full of tension, aware of the importance of what I experience. After the press conference and filling the stomachs of influencer and journalists, the herd was divided into groups. Each of them got her guide who protected us from the siren singing of furniture and accessories and efficiently navigated through the labyrinth corridors of the vast halls. There were 4 stations along the route, and each of them was guarded by one person weaving the dreams of the Ikea Catalog 2020 and talking about the need for sleep (a bold move for a company organizing conferences in the morning).

The culmination of the day were to be musical passions. Huddled together in a small room, we were still wondering who would also lift us when there were warm jazz sounds coming from the small stage. I scrutinized the surroundings closely. There was a piano on the platform, there was a guitar, there was even a man there, which could create a quite sensible picture, but it was at such a safe distance from the instruments that it would not be possible to suspect that he was hanging out with them. Elation was coming from the speakers. Well, travel develops and broadens horizons, I thought and expanded my current concept of "musical ecstasy" to music coming from speakers, and more precisely, as it turned out later, from the shelf and lamp. As proudly avoided by the gentleman on stage, the loudest lamp in our apartment and the best playing shelf were presented to us. I believe. Even if the speakers were not made in cooperation with Ikea Sonos, the musical furniture is rather niche competition.

Where is my Ikea Catalog? - cries of despair will be heard in the cages

Thanks to the premiere I am one of the lucky ones who got their Ikea 2020 catalog (I know, we bloggers sometimes have a great life). Most people will not be so lucky because Ikea has struck the heart of sacred traditions. The company decided to change the distribution of its catalogs and give up distributing them like valuable gifts and putting them in post boxes. Now catalogs will only be received by those who belong to the prestigious Ikea Family club and decide to order it from the website and pick it up in the store. So it will be in vain from the windows I will look for the desired messengers, I will not vain hook the postmen - there will be no such compensation for the Swedish deluge - Ikea 2020 catalog will be viewed only through the bluish computer screen.



EVENT OF THE YEAR: premiere of the IKEA 2020 catalog. This time you won't find it in the mailbox

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